The Book of Disquiet
by OhHowDemonsRan
Summary: Samantha Holbrook, private detective, never thought that working with Sherlock Holmes would be so frustrating, amusing and life-altering. All things considered, it was bound to get interesting. [Will eventually become a Sherlock/OC story - although you should focus on eventually.]


**PROLOGUE - ****"White Blank Page"**

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_Can you lie next to her _  
_and give her your heart, your heart?_  
_As well as your body._  
_And can you lie next to her _  
_and confess your love, your love?_  
_As well as your folly._

**― Mumford and Sons, White Blank Page**

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When I was a little girl, I didn't see why people felt the need to mourn the dead. Even at a young age, I knew that death was as natural as life – perhaps even better, for I knew that life meant pain and death was an equivalent to release, to the quiet after a storm, to peace. It was odd to me that others didn't see that; that they didn't welcome death with open arms and celebrated the perish of their loved ones, the end of their torment.

I used to laugh at God, at his disciples, at the notion of a higher deity that held the title of our Father – the one who watched over us, protected and loved us unconditionally. I saw pain around me, I watched as people struggled to survive and wondered how some could believe in Him, when all He ever did was make His children fall. I didn't understand God and therefore, I chose to ignore faith; to banish it from my life. In my mind I was invincible. I didn't need an old man on a cloud to look after me.

Mind you, the young girl I used to be grew up to become an even more peculiar woman.

My mother believed in destiny. I refused to do so. In fact, I spent my life desperately trying to escape mine – whatever it was – and make my own singular path, not one forced upon me by higher powers. In order to do so, I constantly changed my mind, my opinions, the very essence of my being – the things that made me, me. In just twenty five years, I was a hundred different people who believed in a hundred different things – I died a hundred times just for a new me to take over; to live, laugh and die all over again. I was always lost, completely and utterly lost, but in a way I always knew where to go, what to do, who to be. But not really – not entirely. It was confusing, but it was life.

That was, of course, until I met him. After that, I didn't feel a need to re-invent myself, to change again, and again, and again. With him, I learnt who I was meant to be, and I'll never thank him enough for that. With him, I learned to love blindly. With him, I learnt to live – not just exist.

Last night, I learnt some new things; things that didn't change me, no, but made me grow.

I learnt that no matter how hard you try, you can never trick fate, for it is always there waiting for you and, when you get to that moment in your life when you know in your heart that you were meant to be there… It's natural. Fate is natural. And then you accept it.

I learnt that when you're faced with the demise of someone you truly love, you don't want to celebrate their departure. You want to scream and cry and for them to just come back. Last night, I learnt to mourn.

And, finally, I learnt that when you're looking in the eye of the Grim Reaper himself, you don't really feel like laughing at God anymore. In fact, you accept him, you Love him and you pray that he'll help you out just that one time.

My name is Samantha Holbrook and this is the story of how, after a lifetime of running , I met my death with a smile on my lips and peace in my heart. 'Ts not a very cheery story, mind you, but I think you'll like it.

I know I did.

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**Hello there, guys and gals! Welcome to my new story, a Sherlock one which will focus on an OC I came up with while in the shower. Yes, that's were my best ideas are born. I really should look into the symbolism of showers and ideas. Maybe it has something to do with birth and things.**

**I'm getting sidetracked here, aren't I?**

**Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this little prologue - I know it's not long or very revealing but hey, it's supposed to be like that. Most chapters will be around 4000 WORDS LONG and a new chapter will be released every TUESDAY. **

**Please read and review - it would mean the world and all the stars to know how you feel about my work.**

**All my love,**

_**- OhHowDemonsRan**_


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